tests, exam coming up like flood.
non-stopping. i need a life, man!
school, home, max tune, dinner, home.
it's repeating over and over again.

i know sec 5 gonna be harder then previous
years, but studies is occupying all my freedom.

I'm gonna break free! I need air to breath!
Ahahahahahahaha......!!!!!

Why am i in sec 5?
-Because i want my o level cert.

Then why am i disliking school once again?
-Classmates? Studies? Time? Stress?

i can't get in mind what i seriously want or need?
am i just going back sec 5 just to prove to my dad,
i'm able to? or i'm going back to build up my own future?

i need someone to talk to but who? i'm able to cope with
o level stuff but not my class. ya, i'm stupid. coming up
till so far and now saying i want to give up! no one will even
understand how it feel when your classmate look down on you
and even tease you. i know my english is very bad but why not
correct me but to tease me? put yourself in others shoe first!
if keeping quiet gonna make my life easier in school then i'll
just bloodly keep my mouth shut!

all you guys out there just think teasing others and that person
doesn't fight back is alright. you are FUCKING WRONG!
is just that, that person can't be bothered or is too hurt to even
answer back!

i'm gonna go school! i'm gonna prove to him, I'M NOT WEAK!

for god sake! i need money!
i'm seriously in need of money!
i can't work only till o's over then i'm able.
dad been giving me lesser and lesser money.
i'm dying. i crave for a samsung corby till now
i'm unable to save up to the sum. ): what am i suppose
to do? i want a itouch too. no money no itouch no corby.
i have no one to borrow money from. ):
i know they are purely needs but i want them. ):

i fucking unhappy about it now!

any way to earn fast cash, without me neglecting my
studies. ):

i'm craving for strawberries.
i'm wishing that 2010 will end fast.
i'm wishing that i'll be happier as day pass by.
i wish he will love me more than i do.
i wish i'll not cry anymore.
i wish i'll not be left alone.
i hate being lonely.

i wish angel will fulfill my wishes and hopes.

Happy second month, baby. (:

* i spent my second month at home,
rotting. baby have project to do. so
gonna skip today.*

First month.
we spent it by quarrelling through the
whole day. hais.
hope the next few month are going to be nicer. (:

Just found my old photo.
Didn't expect i'd changed this much.
In size, looks, photo taking angle.






Latest (:


see the difference? (:
alright people, good night.

his mum doesn't seem to like me.
he doesn't seem to notice.
i was treated like a transparent idiot.

he doesn't even bother to message me
even he got his phone back. i have no one
to talk too. i feel like crying.

how am i suppose to tell him, "hey baby,
your mum seem to dislike me." why?
"because when i call her she doesn't even
care she just stare at me similarly when i
say goodbye to her." ended up he will be
telling me "baby, you're thinking too much
my mum didn't dislike you at all"
imagine that will you still bother to even tell him?

ya he'd been this way ever since i'm with him.
just like what my bro always says give him time
to change. ailin, don't think too much, why not
just tell him about what you think.

hais, i don't seem to have time to trouble about
this anymore. O level this year, just let thing be
this way. T.T

人因爱, 伤过几次都还是会继续去爱的。

baby been treating me very nicely after that
day. this will last right? i'm very happy for this two
day. (: even though we can't spend much time
together anymore, but yet i'm still happy cause
baby do care for me much more than before. :D
cheers!

anyway tomorrow school's reopening.
going back Teck Whye Secondary as a Sec 5 student.
new topic, new studying environment, new teacher and
maybe new classmate?
strive hard for 2010 till nov i'll be free (:
cheers! bye! (:
love you guys.

01.01.10 worst day ever.
yet i manage to clear things up.
things should be getting better than before. (: